X-Men Unlimited #2

X-Men Unlimited #2

Writing: Fabian Nicieza

Art: Jan Duursema

Note: This story takes place between Uncanny#306 and X-Men #25

What Went Down:  Our giant-sized story starts on a flashback of Magneto fighting the East German army as the military tries to overtake Wundagore Mountain.  A soldier named Adrian Eiskalt and his brother Ute flee the battle, but Ute stumbles into and knocks over the tombstone of Magneto’s wife Magda.  Enraged, Magneto kills Ute and leaves Adrian…who swears revenge.

This flashback was actually a story Adrian was telling his psychiatrist.  The doctor tells Adrian he has to let go, even as he fantasizes about killing Magneto.  At Empire State University, Gabrielle Haller gives a lecture on the history of Magneto, and whether he should be labeled a dictator or a crusader.  On a plane to Manhattan, Adrian reads the book Fatal Attractions—a study on mutants and Magneto.  Adrian mistakes a passenger for Magneto and almost kills him with a poison needle disguised as a pen.

Once in Manhattan, Adrian watches an ABC News special where Ted Koppel interviews J.B. Chambers, the author of the Fatal Attractions book, and Graydon Creed.  The author offers that humans can live with mutants, and that there is merit to Magneto’s positions.  The next day Adrian has breakfast with Gabrielle Haller, asking for her help in apprehending Magneto, even though he means to kill the Master of Magnetism.  Gabrielle can sense Adrian’s personal stake, and tells him he will doom himself.

On a boat in the Atlantic, Exodus appears to the New Brotherhood of Mutants, but only tries to recruit Phantazia.  She refuses, and the other members are offended that they weren’t selected.  Later Adrian interviews the Toad about working with Magneto and listens to the tape.  We next see Gabrielle Haller talking to Moira MacTaggert about their previous relationships with Charles Xavier.  Gabrielle asks Moira about her studies of Magneto when he was regressed to a child, and also asks for her help neutralizing him.  Moira still blames herself for Magneto not turning out right, so she agrees. 

At a Genetech Bio lab, scientists show Adrian and Gabrielle the new armor that will hide Adrian from the magnetic spectrum (these are the suits that Storm stole the plans for in Uncanny #305).  He is also shown a plastic taser to be used to capture Magneto, but Adrian knows he can modify it to kill. 

In Washington, Peter Gyrich, Val Cooper, and Alexi Vazhin meet with Gabrielle and Adrian.  The first half of the Fatal Attractions crossover has occurred, so it is confirmed that Magneto is definitely alive.  The government agents debate the merits of attacking Magneto, while Adrian thinks he knows where the mutant will go.

At Wundagore Mountain, Magneto is once again visiting the grave of Magda.  Adrian sneaks up on him and has him targeted.  Suddenly Adrian returns to the flashback and reveals that Ute—his brother, pulled a gun on Magneto, and it was the ricochet off Magneto’s forcefield that killed him.  Adrian drops his gun, and the two men look at each other with understanding.  Adrian attempts to shoot himself in the head, but realizes he’s lost nothing except for the hatred he’s been carrying.

How It Was: Hard to believe that once upon a time you could get a sixty page comic in the nineties for the price of a twenty page comic today.  Then again, if this was the standard for content today, would you want to pay that at all?  This issue is a loose tie-in to the Fatal Attractions crossover.  It’s not part of the crossover, but it deals with its events and focuses on its main antagonist Magneto. Much as Magneto’s crusade against humanity is a response to the death of his family, we are given a new protagonist inspired by a dead brother to gain our new perspective on Magneto.

Although Adrian is very one note, there is something fascinating about the way he ignores his surroundings as he focuses on Magneto’s death.  This story works best when it does juxtapose Adrian’s quest with Magneto’s, and whether Magneto is motivated by compassion or vengeance or ego or guilt.  We see all these outsiders weigh in on Magneto, and the only hints we get from the actual man are when he visits his wife’s grave, which could lean toward any or all of the motivations.  The art is very nice looking as far as the characters go; in the first couple of pages, Magneto looks awe inspiring.  Unfortunately the backgrounds let down the image somewhat, as some of the tanks and soldiers don’t look like they’re drawn properly in the background, giving the impression that Magneto is just attacking tiny men.  Also, it seems unnecessary in the latter pages to draw Adrian exactly like Gambit from the neck up.  There’s also a tiny error with a word balloon that is pointing to Graydon Creed when it should be pointing off panel as the response from his opponent. 

The real problem with this issue is that there is far too much exposition.  Yes his history during the Holocaust is very important to our understanding of him here, but it just never ends.  Gabrielle’s history of him lasts for four pages!  Toad talks about resenting him as a member of the Brotherhood for another six!  With sixty pages to fill, it’s obvious that Nicieza is padding out this story as much as possible, but the story suffers because of this; we get away from Adrian and his perspective as all these other characters ramble on. 

And it’s not just Magneto exposition here.  There’s the TV debate that is three pages of summarizing the themes of the X-Men, and nine pages with a scientist explaining Adrian’s tech.  He repeats how it will make him invisible to Magneto like three times.  This writing just isn’t succinct or gripping and it really waters down the main conflict.

Worst of all, the end tries to create a twist, but really it isn’t a twist, it’s just that information has been withheld until the end.  Ute pulled a gun on Magneto, which Adrian decides makes his whole rationalization moot.  The problem is that this fact really weakens Adrian’s position throughout the book.  Adrian himself is a soldier, so he should understand the principles behind self-defense.  Also it cheapens the conflict within Magneto; I much prefer the idea of Magneto overreacting over a personal trespass directly after fighting a huge battle.  One of the great metaphors of Magneto, which is used this issue, is that in trying to prevent another Hitler he becomes more like the man.  It might be nice to see Magneto have to confront this aspect of his worldview and personality.  Also, it seems odd that Adrian would collect all this info on Magneto when he was just going to sneak up and shoot him in the back. 

This might’ve made an okay forty page story in an annual, or even a decent ten or twenty page story.  But there’s too much here that distracts from the main ideas this story is trying to get across.  I will admit as a comic fan it is neat to see all these nods to continuity, from the Silver Age to the Claremont/Jim Lee stuff, but ultimately it detracts from the story.  There is a lot of attention to detail, but most of it isn’t in service to the story.  Plus after going through all of that, it’s disappointing to see Adrian drop his gun without even a word exchanged by the two men.

Completists Only

Uncanny X-Men #360

Uncanny X-Men #360

Writing: Steve Seagle

Art: Chris Bachalo

What Went Down: On the anniversary of Magneto’s first battle with the X-Men in Uncanny X-Men #1, a news reporter is covering the controversial launching of the Benassi rocket.  While the government insists it is just carrying camera equipment, skeptics are protesting the secrecy of the project and the nuclear components on the rocket. 

A mysterious bald figure in a wheelchair is collecting a new team of mutants to help him save the world.  There is the Grey King, a graduate assistant with telepathic dampening powers; Chaos, an autistic who can shoot psycho-plasmic force blasts; Mercury, who has liquid metal limbs; Rapture, a nun who is blue and has angel wings; Crux, an ice skater who can shoot fire and ice; and Landslide, a giant brawler.  At the end of the recruitment we see that it is none other than Professor X inviting the mutants to join the X-Men.

On a cruise ship named Titania, Colossus, Kitty Pryde, and Nightcrawler are enjoying a vacation after the disbanding of Excalibur.  The group discusses how it is the anniversary of the X-Men going public, and the ways that this event changed their lives.  Their reverie is interrupted by the new X-Men, who attack the cruise ship.  While Nightcrawler evacuates passengers and Colossus tries to plug a hole created by the fake X-Men, Kitty is captured by the group.

In the sewers of Washington D.C., Marrow, Rogue, Storm, and Wolverine are fighting a high tech security system.  Finding a door with an X on it, the group enters it to find a room outside a lab.  Although they were invited by sometime X-ally Peter Corbeau, it appears Corbeau has been abducted.  A tape left at the crime scene incriminates the X-Men. 

In a bunker in the Florida swamps, the evil X-Men are holed up with the captured Kitty.  Kitty is shocked that the mutants call themselves X-Men, and even more shocked to find that they have intimate knowledge of the real X-Men.  Professor X shows up to chastise Kitty for her behavior.

Inside the Lincoln Memorial, the four remaining X-Men meet with Val Cooper to discuss Corbeau’s disappearance.  Val offers the X-Men resources to help them clear their name.  Over in Salem, Nightcrawler and Colossus have gone to the mansion to enlist the help of the other X-Men.  The mansion is empty except for a shotgun wielding Cecilia Reyes, who is housesitting for the team.  After a brief misunderstanding, Cecilia leads the two heroes to the hanger where the original Blackbird is being housed after it was salvaged in Uncanny #353.  Kurt thinks he can fix it.

Back in Florida, Xavier tells Kitty that he cannot access his emotions because Bastion attempted to bind his functions to a computer with a virus.  Xavier’s detached behavior worries Kitty, as does the fact that he didn’t just ask for her help.  On the X-Men’s borrowed jet, the team observes a press conference outside the Cape Citadel rocket launch where a US director is seemingly assassinated.  We then get a scene where some shadowy government figures discuss how this was a fake distraction to take people’s attention away from what is really on the rocket.

Kitty manages to purge the virus from the computer.  Xavier rewards her by having his X-Men recapture her and prepare her for storage.  Up in the sky, the X-Men’s plane is dismantled in the air.  They assume Magneto is attacking, but it’s actually the fake X-Men.  A mid-air battle takes place, but Storm and Rogue lose their powers due to the Grey King.  Wolverine is left plummeting to the ground, but he is saved by Nightcrawler.  After saving the rest of the team, the Blackbird is shot down by Mercury.  

How It Was:  I had assumed I was done with gimmicky shiny foil cover double-sized issues, but lo and behold here we have two in a row.  Uncanny X-Men #360 and X-Men #80 are celebrating the 35^th anniversary of Uncanny X-Men #1; to my recollection these are the end of the foil-cover era for the X-Men.  These issues also mark some drastic changes to the books, mostly forced upon the writers by editors.  The team has been scaled back to a core cast of seven regulars, Uncanny and X-Men tie into each other regularly making for essentially a bi-weekly reading experience, and the former members of Excalibur are being shuffled back on the team. 

I’m torn about the inclusion of Nightcrawler, Kitty, and Colossus.  On the one hand I’m overjoyed as an X-Men fan to see them since these characters haven’t been on the main X-Men team in almost a decade (Excalibur lasted 125 issues).  On the other hand, it’s clear there is no real reason or story behind having them back on the team—somebody just thought it would be neat, which it is.  But there is something to be said for picking a cast because of potential stories to do and picking a team because people like the characters.  Worst of all, the majority of the new X-Men (Maggott and Cecilia), who had tons of story potential as the characters grew into their heroic roles, have completely been thrown out without any warning.  I really liked both these characters and the books feel more directionless without them.

But I should probably talk about the comic itself.  It’s double-sized, and fairly padded out, although there are some nice action sequences towards the end. A lot of the fluff revolves around the tedious newscaster exposition scenes that just aren’t very interesting.  There’s an incomprehensible attempt to make them more relevant by having a government conspiracy with a faked assassination that makes no sense at all.  If you wanted people to not pay attention to you’re high profile satellite launch, pretending to kill a member of the staff seems like it would be counterproductive.  Having the story take place at Cape Citadel is a nice call back to the first issue of the series, but many of these scenes feel tiresome, constantly reminding the reader about the rocket and that mutants are a divisive issue.  There’s a whole four-page sequence with Val Cooper that serves no purpose other than to say out loud that the X-Men are still hated and mistrusted, and for Val to give the X-Men a TV and a plane.  Also, the necessity of Kitty to “Xavier’s” plan seems arbitrary.

While I really like the homage to Giant-Sized X-Men #1 with Xavier collecting his new team, none of the characters really stand out.  Most of them do feel derivative, although that does tie into their origins, and none of them really come off as likable or menacing.  Plus Chaos, the autistic character, speaks in these one-word fragments, and I’ve never known any autistic person to do that.  Strangely it is played for comedy most of the time; Nightcrawler even mocks him for it at one point in the story.

Bachalo does a great job making the cruise ship and air battles seem frantic and chaotic.  The X-Men versus guns in the sewer feels a little forced for the sake of action, and I don’t understand how a door in the sewer leads to a vent on the surface where the X-Men can see the hole their friend was abducted in.  Peter Corbeau is pulled out from comic limbo for no other purpose then he was a scientist in that one space story in the seventies.  You know, the Phoenix Saga. 

The mystery over Xavier’s cold demeanor does work really well, and it’s about time the books actually addressed what is up with Charles.  And although I still think the Excalibur recruits feel forced onto this team, they do get some nice moments.  I enjoy the discussion of life without the X-Men where Kurt realizes he’d probably be dead.  There is also a sense of exhilaration from the team when Colossus and Nightcrawler first show up to save them. 

This issue could work a little better as a normal-sized issue.  Take away some of the exposition from the newscaster and Val Cooper, maybe a little more time for us to get to know the evil X-Men and care about them one way or the other, and this could’ve been one of the greats.  It does succeed in feeling like a new direction, it gets the characters right, and it is bookended by two solid action sequences. 

B-

X-Factor #130

X-Factor #130
Writing: Howard Mackie
Art: Eric Battle

What Went Down: Before I start, I just want to point out that the end of this issue is completely spoiled by the bottom left corner of the first page. If that’s not an indicator of the quality of a creative team, I don’t know what is?

Anywho, the issue starts off with Mystique performing target practice on a poster of her son Graydon Creed. Pyro is by her side, even though he was forcibly abducted in Uncanny X-Men #338. He asks her how they are going to complete their plan, and Mystique demonstrates that she has hacked her inhibitor collar to allow herself to morph into Val Cooper.

Val Cooper is at a hotel with Graydon Creed right before the election. Creed is insistent that he be allowed to perform his final speech even though he has received numerous death threats. Cooper tells him that he either has to accept X-Factor’s help or cancel the speech. The rest of the team bursts in through the window and starts searching for explosives; Creed is incredibly unhappy to see his psychotic father Sabretooth on the team. Creed’s bodyguards confront X-Factor, and Val and Forge recognize Cannonball as one of them. Forge demonstrates that Sabretooth has a collar that prevents him from getting too close to Graydon, so he reluctantly agrees.

Outside the rally, Val is ambushed by the real Val Cooper, and it is revealed that the one we’ve been following was Mystique. A group of protestors get into a riot with some of Creed’s supporters, and Mystique is able to slip away in the crowd. Val tells X-Factor to search for Mystique, and they catch her in disguise aiming a weapon at the presidential nominee. Polaris takes the gun, and Mystique is restrained and hauled away, even though she is claiming that she was trying to help.

Creed confronts his mother and tells the authorities to take her away, but the team insists on doing it themselves. In an armored truck, Mystique swears to Val that she was trying to save Creed, along with some vague mutterings about conspiracy theories in the government. Later, as Graydon Creed takes the stage, the X-Factor team spots Pyro in the crowd. Graydon Creed gets shot and incinerated. X-Factor captures Pyro and escapes, but they claim that Pyro and Mystique are innocent because their weapons turned out to be forcefield generators. Mystique even consoles Pyro by saying that they tried. On a computer screen, a mysterious text message appears claiming that Creed was the first, but Mystique is next.

How It Was: With the month of the actual election already past in the real world, the X-offices had to decide where exactly they were taking the “Creed runs for president” plotline. I can understand not wanting to have a fundamentalist racist as president of the Marvel Universe. This however stands as a good example of a neat idea that was not thought through all the way. While the fate of Creed is shocking, and it is understandable how the death of a presidential candidate would fuel anti-mutant sentiments, it is clear that the resolution of this thread hasn’t been created yet. So once again we get a couple of months of people talking about the assassination like it’s the major direction of all the X-books, and the influence of every villain, before it’s completely abandoned and forgotten about. Yes, it’s this old song again. If you’re curious, the identity of the assassin is actually revealed in Fabian Nicieza’s X-Men Forever mini-series from around 2000 or 2001. But enough about the ill preparedness of the X-offices, lets get onto the quality of the issue.

This is one of those events that should have happened in an X-Men book, but was probably editorially demanded to boost sales of the flagging X-Factor book. Not only does X-Factor come off looking really awful in this issue, there are a number of irregularities with what has already been established in the X-Men books. Uncanny #338 saw Pyro running for his life from “her”, who was obviously meant to be Mystique. This issue finds them working toward their goal mutually, and without the aid of Avalanche, who had been mentioned previously. Sam Guthrie does appear, but only in a one panel cameo as he’s recognized by Forge and Val; he literally has no impact on the story after months of set up, which couldn’t have been the initial plan. Realistically he gets pushed to the side because X-Factor has to be assigned to Creed at the last minute for this plot to make sense in an issue of X-Factor.

Then there is just the sheer ridiculousness of the plot structure. Mystique and Pyro are actually trying to save Creed, so they decide to hide in the crowd with force field weapons that look exactly like guns, and Mystique thinks the best way to accomplish her goal is to destroy what little trust her handlers have put in her and do everything herself. After she’s caught, she makes a halfhearted attempt to explain away the flaws in her plan as a contingency against some vast conspiracy, but what really comes off as stupid is how the members of X-Factor keep interrupting her as she’s trying to explain. And why did she even bother to take Val’s place in the first place? It’s just really silly how the script tries to add in all these twists that make no sense whatsoever. Even the sheer fact that the government would assign a mutant super hero team with two former terrorists on it to defend a presidential candidate strikes as pretty dumb. Yes that does fit into the vast conspiracy theory, but you’d think that Val or Forge might question this a little harder.

I didn’t read a lot of X-Factor during this period, but I have to say that this roster isn’t very interesting at all. Polaris seems to have nothing to do now that Havok has left the team. Forge and Val seem to have the same personality, while Wild Child just grunts a lot. Sabretooth does have some funny scenes where he mocks his son by pretending to be a proud father, but once again I have to question his purpose on a government super hero team. Mystique is super stoic, but you’d think she’d be a little more aggressive about saving her son if that was the initial storyline.

This is a legitimately interesting course for the X-Books to take; the execution is just forced and deviates too much from the initial setup. Worse is that the story feels like it has no real direction as red herring after red herring is introduced to try to build on the mystery of the assassin. And while this was a perfect opportunity for the Marvel offices to get people interested in X-Factor, I can’t say it does a very good job at that either. The characters just don’t do anything to make the audience care about them in this issue, and they don’t really have anything to do in the actual story. Overall it’s disappointing.

D-

X-Men #57

X-Men #57
Writing: Scott Lobdell
Art: Andy Kubert

What Went Down: In Cerebro, which I thought was still damaged but whatever, Xavier is asking the computer to locate himself. Because Xavier no longer has powers the computer cannot detect him. Xavier has Cerebro delete all files on Professor X, including the ones in Massachusetts, Muir Isle, and the Mutant Underground. The mansion is still fairly damaged and Xavier reflects on the destruction while looking at old photos of the original X-Men.

The doorbell rings and Cyclops answers it to find Val Cooper standing there. Cyclops asks about his brother, but Havok is still missing after turning evil. She has actually come to take Professor X into custody. Cyclops, Wolverine, and Bishop are not eager to allow that. They walk past Iceman and Cannonball, who are watching video of Graydon Creed’s speeches in preparation to go undercover in his camp. Cyclops reasserts that Xavier isn’t going anywhere, but Storm shows up to explain that Cooper is right because no one can guarantee that something like Onslaught will never happen again.

Outside in Washington Square Park, Beast is enjoying a beautiful day while using an image inducer to hide his appearance. A young child runs by pretending to be a mutant monster, which spoils Hank’s good mood. Beast is meeting up with his ex-girlfriend Trish Tilby. It seems that during his time spent as a captive of Dark Beast, Hank realized that Trish was the love of his life. Even though he felt betrayed by the Legacy story, he realized he overreacted. They embrace, even though she doesn’t give him a definite answer.

Back at the mansion, Jean shows up and tells the team that she agrees with turning Xavier over, since she was in Xavier’s mind while he was being influenced by Onslaught and did not enjoy it one bit. Val turns the TV to the news to show the destruction to the city and the vigils people are giving for the Avengers and the Fantastic Four. This goes a long way toward proving her point.

In Manhattan, J. Jonah Jameson thinks back to when he saw Storm and Cannonball during the beginning of the Onslaught event. Bastion shows up to their meeting and tells Jameson that he should stop the inquiries he is making. Jameson tells him not to bother intimidating him. Bastion threatens that he knows a lot about the publisher, so Jameson throws his wallet at him to prove his point.

Back at the mansion Joseph shows up to weigh in on the debate. He thinks that they are seeking to punish Xavier for something he did not do. Val doesn’t recognize Joseph. Quicksilver also chimes in with his opinion. Xavier shows up to quell the debate and agrees to turn himself over to learn more about the threat he represents. Joseph feels guilty because once again he is to be left blameless, but Xavier insists that it is a second chance for him. He gives a speech thanking the X-Men for their loyalty and patience, but says he owes it to the perished heroes to do what he feels is best. Back at Archangel’s loft, Psylocke finds it empty. When she searches for Warren, all she finds are feathers.

How It Was: Well after the X-Men got their crossover stolen from them by the other Marvel Heroes, it left them without much of a direction to go in. Plus afterwards, Scott Lobdell was once again left with two monthly X-Men titles to fill. He goes the understandable route of having the books basically make up one bi-weekly story in individual increments. Fair enough. This issue is spent dealing with what should happen to Professor X after Onslaught. This is a fair question and Lobdell uses all the characters to cover just about every possible side of the debate. While there are different factors to consider, it basically boils down to the potential threat of Xavier versus how he was not purposefully responsible for the creation of Onslaught. Of course this means that once again we have an issue that is light on action. That’s okay, since Onslaught took forever, but Andy Kubert does feel the necessity to throw in some overwrought action poses of the X-Men acting hostile towards Val Cooper.

The Beast stuff is okay; it’s nice that Lobdell is still following up on his long captivity; it’s just that his relationship with Trish never really goes anywhere. It is yet another example of an X-Men subplot that seemed better in hindsight but never really developed. The sequences with Jameson and Bastion are just plain weird; I still can’t understand what he’s doing in this series, especially since Cannonball and Iceman are getting ready to go undercover. That seems redundant as far as looking through Creed’s dirty laundry goes.

Val Cooper carries the issue as the realist who hates what she’s doing but knows that it’s the right thing. Her use of the news allows a nice glimpse of the effects of Onslaught, and it’s cool to see her stand her own against the likes of Wolverine. It’s a shame that Kubert drew her hair wrong and it had to be covered up with a dialogue balloon about the summer frizzes, but oh well. Xavier also shines in this issue with his speech at the end; it’s nice to see him jump at the chance to have purpose again after losing his powers. I don’t really understand the point of deleting all his files, maybe something Lobdell was going to build on? But it’s nice to see one last issue show how important Professor X is to the X-Men before he’s shipped out of the book.

B

X-Factor Annual #7

X-Factor Annual #7
Writing: Fabian Nicieza and Peter David
Art: Joe Quesada, Derrick Roberson, and Joe Madurieira

Update: Click Here for Part 4 of Shattershot.

What Went Down: The first six pages are dedicated to Mojo angrily recapping the story thus far and taking out his anger on his second in command, Major Domo. Note that the art is backwards, depicting the events of Uncanny when describing the X-Men issue and vice versa. It appears that even though the Death Sponsors failed in their task last issue, everyone assumed it was Mojo, so he has continued to lose favor with the people. He decides to contact Spiral and have her deal with Arize.

Since X-Factor doesn’t have a Danger Room, they don’t start the issue in the middle of a training session. Instead, we are given an overwrought scene where the team is preparing lunch, and none of the characters can open a jar of mayonnaise, including Strong Guy, who should have super strength, shouldn’t he? Anyway, the whole scene devolves into the team making a mess, and it’s all meant to be very funny, but it isn’t really. Val Cooper pops in to tell the team that they have a mission: they are going to hunt down Spiral because she has been spotted making trouble. Val feels responsible because Spiral was a member of Freedom Force, a government sponsored group of villains that Cooper was in charge of prior to the nationalization of X-Factor.

In case you were wondering what Arize was up to, he has been working out a plan to broadcast all of Earth’s television to the inhabitants of Mojoworld as an alternative to Mojo’s rule. At the same time, Spiral is threatening a group of villagers in order to discover Arize’s location. By the time X-Factor arrives, Spiral has set fire to the whole town.

Spiral teleports to Arize’s cabin and cuts the connection he was using. The whole time she blames him for some unspeakable evil. She attacks Arize, but Val interrupts and tries to talk Spiral down; she ends up shooting at Spiral. The rest of X-Factor joins the fight. After injuring Polaris, Havok flips out and blasts Spiral with a heck of an energy blast. Spiral is then given the chance to explain herself, so she tells her origin.

Spiral was once an Earth stuntwoman named Ricochet Rita. She fell in love with Longshot, followed him to his world, and learned that Longshot was known as the Fallen Messiah—meaning he was destined to perpetually fail over and over again. Mojo had Arize turn her into Spiral (in Arize’s future, but Spiral’s past), and then had her travel through time to push her past self towards Longshot, perpetuating the cycle, and driving Spiral insane. Arize expresses remorse and offers to help her finally put an end to Mojo’s rule. The future savior of that dimension is said to be Shatterstar, so Spiral and Arize travel to the future of Mojoworld together. X-Factor wonders if they should do anything, but decide that there is nothing they can do. Havok feels sorry that his former teammate is destined to always fail at his goal, but Val thinks that everybody can learn from his or her mistakes.

What Else Went Down: Val Cooper is overrun with paperwork, but she decides to put it off until the next day because she has tickets to a Salute to Motown concert. However she decides to stay and do her work after Multiple Man calls Val and impersonates President Bush. Val reluctantly gives the tickets to him and Wolfsbane and goes through all of the papers. After she finishes, a dragon made of papers attacks her. It chases her all over the office until she manages to get it into a paper shredder. Unfortunately, after she shreds it, the shreddings make up another monster that attacks her.

Jamie wakes up Val and tells her that he feels guilty about tricking her, revealing that Val was dreaming about the paper monsters. Val rewards his honesty by chasing him with scissors and a letter opener.

What Else Also Went Down: A young boy named Cal, who is obviously modeled after Calvin from Calvin and Hobbes, is being bullied at school. He decides to go to Strong Guy’s house and hire him to be his bodyguard. After telling him his story, Cal convinces Guido to go intimidate the bullies for him. After giving the kids a good scare, Guido leaves.

A couple of weeks later, Strong Guy decides to check in on Cal, but he is shocked to discover that Cal is now the bully, threatening to sick Guido on anybody that doesn’t listen to him. Guido shakes him down and tells Cal that he doesn’t want to ever see him bullying again.

How It Was: Well… it’s something. I’ll start with the good. Joe Quesada’s art is very good; all of the panels have a nice sense of motion and action, so it’s a solid effort from Marvel’s future editor-in-chief. Also, the origin of Spiral is surprisingly gripping. At first it seems that she’s just out for revenge because Arize helped turn her into a freak of nature, but the fact that she is forced to relive her own downfall over and over again is actually a really interesting take on a character that controls time and space.

Now for the bad. As I stated before, the first two opening sequences are absolutely pointless and contribute very little to the overall story. But the major fault of this story is the boring fight that takes up most of the issue. I know before I complained about villains being one dimensional, and Spiral definitely isn’t. The main problem is that Spiral is outnumbered by six, and the fight is completely one sided. There’s just not a lot she can do against characters like Strong Guy, Quicksilver, and Havok. Furthermore, Arize’s plan to free people of Mojo’s signal seemed pretty dumb since Earth TV is just as monotonous and insubstantial as anything that Mojo could show.

Unlike the other issues, the back-up strips are actually better than the main story. Peter David’s humor is always what made X-Factor work, whether it’s with Madrox impersonating George Bush or Cal’s great line at the end of his story, David has a lot of fun with these quick, silly tales. They are by no means his greatest work, but they are a lot better to read than any part of Shattershot or any of the other mini stories thus far.

C-