Wolverine #101

Wolverine #101
Writing: Larry Hama
Art: Adam Kubert

What Went Down: Wolverine starts off the issue by stabbing Ozymandias and jumping into the abyss after Cyclops. Cyclops is busy shooting his optic blasts to slow his descent, but it’s not working, and he gets knocked unconscious by some debris. Jean fights a stone Magneto who has complete control over rock.

Wolverine catches Cyclops and stabs the wall to stop their descent. Scott wakes up and sees a carving of Professor X in the wall in front of him; he wonders out loud why Apocalypse would revere a carving of Xavier. Then Cyclops flashes back to the plane crash in his origin and passes out. Wolverine starts climbing the stone face.

Above, Iceman, Jean, and Cannonball are slowly being overwhelmed. Jean tells Iceman to extend a bridge, but the stone Wolverine attacks him. Some more stone statues are about to ambush the group, but Elektra knocks them off the ledge. The Magneto statue pins Jean, and flings some rock spikes at Wolverine, who shields Cyclops with his body. Scott responds by blowing the statue away with a laser blast. Ozymandias destroys the column in the center with all the carvings to preserve its secrets, so Iceman saves Wolverine and Cyclops.

Afterwards Wolverine acts savage, but Jean calms him down. Everyone agrees that it’s time to leave.

How It Was: I cannot see what the X-Offices were thinking at all with this one. How does giving your main character absurd proportions and reducing his mind so that he can only growl make for a better book? At one point he actually licks Cyclops’ face like a dog! Frankly this story is stupid for so many reasons, the main one being Wolverine’s transformation. The second reason is that I can’t really tell why Ozymandias is fighting the X-Men, other than the fact that he’s a bad guy and they’re good guys.

So it’s just an issue of the X-Men fighting stone statues for no reason. Kubert competently renders the action, but there’s no real investment in any of it. Elektra’s role in this story is so minor that she might as well not be in it, and as I said before, Wolverine is not compelling now that he has the brain of an animal with no personality. And the reveal of Professor X’s depiction in Apocalypse’s temple feels significant here, but is never mentioned again, so it’s hard to get excited by it.

Overall, I do not have a lot to say about this issue. It’s dull, boring, and disappointing overall.

F

Uncanny X-Men #332

Uncanny X-Men #332
Writing: Scott Lobdell
Art: Joe Madureira

What Went Down: The issue starts out with Elektra stalking Super Feral Wolverine and recapping the events of Wolverine #100. At the offices of Landau, Luckman, and Lake, Professor X is asking a woman named Ms. Cullhoden about the whereabouts of Wolverine. Xavier reveals that he knows about all twenty-six branch offices as well as the ones in alternate dimensions. The X-Men are waiting for the Professor outside in the car. Jean mentions that she and Wolverine worked for LLL in Wolverine #97, while Cannonball and Iceman talk about how Sam blames himself for losing Wolverine.

Jean picks up Logan’s telepathic echo, and Xavier tells the team to leave him at the office. Ms. Cullhoden then shoots Xavier, but it is revealed to be a trick of Xavier’s telepathy. Xavier holds the woman with his mind, and explains that he will not lose Wolverine.

Wolverine discovers an abandoned city and falls through a trap door, frustrating Elektra as she tries to follow him. Wolverine falls and discovers Ozymandias, a servant of Apocalypse who was once his enslaver. He is the scribe of Apocalypse and has visions of the future that he makes into sculptures. He shows Wolverine some of his sculpting depicting Holocaust’s destruction of Avalon and the Age of Apocalypse.

The X-Men interrupt Ozymandias’ revelry and burst through the wall. The villain uses his powers to make his sculptures come to life and attack the X-Men; most of them are from the Age of the Apocalypse. Ozy also explains that he was manipulated by Apocalypse in much the same way that Sinister was. During the fight, Cyclops gets knocked down a hole, while Wolverine is grabbed by Ozymandias.

How It Was: We continue to explore “New” Wolverine in part two of this unnamed crossover story. And much like New Coke long before it, New Wolverine is a huge mistake. After rereading these issues today, I am now convinced that Logan’s new design had to have come from Joe Madureira since it matches his style so well, with his over-muscled torso and the exaggerated proportions for his hands and feet. Absolutely horrible.

The surprise of this issue is that Xavier gets to kick ass. First he puts the LLL representative in her place, shows he is fully aware of their “secret” organization, and then messes with the woman to demonstrate how serious he really is. I don’t know if this is Onslaught talking or not, but Xavier is awesome in this issue.

Cannonball’s guilt feels a little misplaced since he did save Wolverine from Genesis by himself. And Ozymandias isn’t really that great a villain, although he looks pretty cool. Even though the cliffhanger seems like it would be pretty good, there is absolutely no sense of urgency at all to save Cyclops. Plus, I have no idea why Joe Mad is obscuring Elektra’s identity the whole issue, when we already know who it is from Wolverine #100. This is definitely the definition of a middle issue in a story, and not a great story. Grunting Wolverine isn’t compelling, Ozymandias isn’t really that interesting, and the whole thing comes off as rather ill-advised.

D+

Wolverine #100

Wolverine #100
Writing: Larry Hama
Art: Adam Kubert

What Went Down: Genesis and the Dark Riders have captured Wolverine, and they are planning to re-bond his skeleton with adamantium, so he can serve their master Apocalypse as a Horseman. This adamantium was harvested from the Wolverine villain Cyber, so there are concerns that Wolverine might reject it because it is an inferior grade.

In a vent up above, Cannonball is hiding with woman named Zoe who claims she is an Expediter. She’s an employee of Landau, Luckman, and Lake, an interdimensional law firm that appears in Wolverine and Deadpool a lot. In another part of the base, they see hundreds of sarcophagi filled with live prisoners surrounding a single sarcophagus with Apocalypse’s image on it. This obviously means that the Dark Riders are going to try to resurrect Apocalypse.

Wolverine’s skin starts to excrete adamantium because they are flowing too much into him. Cannonball tries to get Zoe to help him, but she teleports away. Cannonball decides to attack the Dark Riders. As the Riders beat him, Cannonball apologizes to Logan. Wolverine starts yelling in his tube, and all of a sudden rejected adamantium shoots out of his body, freeing Wolverine and killing/wounding many of the bad guys.

Cannonball flies after Wolverine and picks him up. We don’t get a good look at him, but Cannonball tells him that they have to stop Apocalypse from rising. In a cabin in the mountains, Elektra and Stick sense Wolverine’s “fall.” Back in Genesis’ lair, Cannonball is about be killed by Spyne and Deadbolt, but Wolverine kills them both. He then uses Deadbolt’s glowing, severed head to lure Gauntlet into a trap. While Genesis fights Cannonball, they can hear the screams of the Dark Riders.

We finally get the reveal of the new, more savage Wolverine—part dog, part troll, all stupid. As Wolverine kills Genesis, Cannonball pries open Apocalypse’s sarcophagus, only to find that it is empty. Wolverine asks Cannonball to tell Cable that he’s sorry about killing his son, and then disappears. The issue ends with Elektra leaving to help Wolverine.

How It Was: Wolverine celebrates its 100th issue with a big, double-sized, character-altering story. Also, there’s a big reflective hologram thing in the middle of the cover. Now I can see where the writers were coming from with this one. Every reader and their mother was predicting that Wolverine would get his adamantium back in issue #100, so the X-office decided to do something different to surprise readers. And I can respect that; it’s good that the writers wanted to keep readers guessing. Hama even structures the villain’s plot to involve putting the metal back in Wolverine, right before pulling the old switcharoo.

And that’s where it all goes bad as the Wolverine creative team turns their eponymous character, arguably the most popular Marvel character of the time, into a giant troll with no nose, huge hands and feet, long nails, and no personality. This, to put it lightly, is terrible. Yes, all of the X-books had been dealing with Wolverine’s feral regression, and they wanted to make Wolverine even more tough and savage, but he looks absolutely ridiculous. This is easily the silliest looking version of Wolverine ever.

The whole story is a bit of misfire, especially since it focuses upon Genesis, who is supposed to be a Cable villain.  There’s no real sense of weight or closure after Wolverine kills him because we haven't ever seen him in this series up to this point. I guess turning Wolverine into a Horseman is as good a reason as any to try to put the metal back, but it leads to Logan spending half the double-sized issue in a glass tube. And there is way too much exposition while he’s in the tube with every member of the Dark Riders chiming in for no reason. Zoe is little more than a plot device who disappears when Hama runs out of exposition, but Cannonball does get to shine by taking on a far superior force on behalf of Wolverine. Too bad the twist of Apocalypse not being in the coffin is a total anticlimax.

The parts that work best in this book are right before the big reveal of “new” Wolverine. When he’s stalking the Dark Riders and murdering them one by one, you can’t help but feel like Wolverine is the most badass hero there is. Also, the scene where Wolverine’s body spits out shards of adamantium is kind of cool in a ridiculous, WTF sort of way. It’s unfortunate that this leads to such a boring and silly looking iteration of the old Canucklehead because Hama does manage to get a couple of neat moments out of this particular issue.

C-