X-Force #55

X-Force #55
Writing: Jeph Loeb
Art: Adam Pollina

What Went Down: We open on Shatterstar holding Meltdown, formerly Boom Boom, right above one of the SHIELD Hellicarrier’s engines. She throws a time-bomb in and counts it down. On the bridge, Dum-Dum Dugan is in charge; G.W. Bridge is currently running SHIELD because I believe Nick Fury died over in the Hulk series. Anyway, alarms start going off and Dugan starts yelling at people. A shadowy figure tells Dugan that he’ll take care of it and that mutants fall under his jurisdiction. Contessa Valentina shows up to tell Dugan not to freak out.

In other parts of the Hellicarrier, different squads of X-Force members break in. Cable is teamed with Caliban, who is tasked with locating a particular mutant. Cable brings up some recent X-Force events while they walk. Domino and Siryn discover a load of invisible lasers, but Dom is able to use her luck powers to avoid them while shooting out all the weapons emplacements.

Meltdown and Shatterstar are attacked by some SHIELD troops, but Meltdown discovers they’re all LMDs, so they can use lethal force on the robots. After defeating them, Tabitha searches the ship’s databases and discovers that Sabretooth is still alive, but his location is classified. She blows up the computer because she is still angry about Sabretooth’s betrayal of her sympathies.

Back on the bridge, Dum-Dum yells at his people some more. As X-Force makes their way through the ship, they tear out a variety of systems. Caliban leads Cable to a big round door, saying they’re objective is behind it. Cable contacts the rest of the team to meet them there, and they proceed to combine they’re powers to open the door. Inside, they find Cyclops strapped to a machine. Also, SHIELD has surrounded X-Force while they were opening the door.

G.W. Bridge appears to tell X-Force that Cyclops is a prisoner of the U.S. government. The team pretends to surrender, but Cable uses his powers to free Cyclops of his headpiece allowing him to take out all the SHIELD soldiers with his optic blasts. Bridge is the only one left standing, so Cable punches him out. The team escapes, and Jean Grey picks them all up in a jet. She shares a kiss with Cyclops afterwards.

In an epilogue, Warpath is enjoying a relaxing beach vacation with Risque after disappearing during a battle in a previous issue. The cliffhanger is that he doesn’t know if he wants to leave Risque to rejoin the team.

How It Was: Well, this feels like an unnecessary detour. Granted, it’s not taking up an X-Men issue, but it’s still hard to see why any of this was necessary. We never get to find out why the Friends of Humanity turn Cyclops over to SHIELD or what Kelly’s huge secret was. I also can’t picture X-Force fans being thrilled about having all the book’s plot lines derailed for a meaningless crossover with Uncanny X-Men.

Still, parts of this story still work as a kind of big, dumb heist caper. It’s nice to see the members of X-Force working together to infiltrate the ship so effectively, and there’s some decent action and interactions. Since I’m primarily an X-Men fan, it’s nice to see Meltdown following up on Sabretooth since that’s one of the few character arcs I’m familiar with. Almost everyone clearly has one or two subplots they’re going through, which is nice, but I get the distinct feeling that none of them are furthered with this issue. Also, I don’t like how Domino’s power becomes a plot device to easily overcome any obstacle.

The main problems come from the fact that the whole issue is dedicated to solely rescuing Cyclops and the incompetent portrayal of SHIELD. Yes there is some alluding to factional infighting within the organization, but SHIELD still comes off as being run by a bunch of idiots, which is usually the case when they’re in any book other than they’re own. All Dum-Dum Dugan does is yell for the whole issue, and as far as being worthless goes, the same goes for G.W. Bridge. It’s exciting to see that Bastion might get involved, but then he disappears after the beginning of the book and nothing comes of his telling off Dugan at all.

This is not really where the story in Uncanny #333 needed to go. It feels like a needless distraction for X-Force, and it’s hard to get excited about SHIELD in the 90s without Nick Fury. This feels like a competent team book, but it turns out to be nothing special, which is a shame since this was a golden opportunity to gain more readers. You can almost feel how hard this series wants to be X-Men with the logo at the top of the cover, or at the very least recapture its initial popularity.

C+

Uncanny X-Men #333

Uncanny X-Men #333
Writing: Scott Lobdell
Art: Pascual Ferry

What Went Down: In his Virginia mansion, Senator Robert Kelly acts super edgy and waves around a gun, looking for someone. He finds Cyclops, who the Senator had called earlier. Kelly reveals that he is aware of members of Xavier’s Mutant Underground, but Cyclops doesn’t really care. Then Kelly begs for Cyclops’ help.

Above the Pentagon, the X-Men are hovering in the cloaked Blackbird while Jean Grey and Gambit infiltrate the building to learn about Operation Zero Tolerance. Cannonball compares the stunt to something he would’ve committed in X-Force, which honors Storm, while Dark Beast tries to maintain his identity in front of Iceman and Professor X.

In an underground sub-basement of the Pentagon, Jean is using her telepathy to disguise herself and Gambit. Also, in case you’re wondering, all of the mutant detecting technology in the Pentagon was created by Forge, who told the X-Men how to block it.

In Colorado, Archangel is still recovering from the injury Sabretooth gave him. Psylocke is also recovering, and she is easily able to sneak up on Warren outside. Betsy wonders about the changes the Crimson Dawn has done to her body and mind. Something appears behind Psylocke, asking for help. For some reason this causes Betsy to faint, and when Warren flies down to help her, the pain from his wing causes him to fall unconscious as well.

Back at the Pentagon, Jean marvels at the various politicians and officials assembled. The group is greeted by Bastion, who we are meeting for the first time. He describes Zero Tolerance as a survival task force, and tells the officials that there is a mysterious threat looming known as Onslaught. Also, Jean can’t scan his mind.

In Kelly’s mansion, Kelly is telling Cyclops that he found something after getting involved in Project: Widawake; something to do with the extinction of mutants. They are ambushed by an explosive from the Friends of Humanity. Oh and Graydon Creed is stupid enough to sit in a van outside the attempted assassination of a senator during his presidential campaign.

Over in the Blackbird, Xavier tries to listen to the presentation telepathically; Storm reminds him that he said he was unable to do this, but Xavier brushes her off. In the middle of his presentation on Onslaught, Bastion reveals that he can detect Jean and Remy, so he attacks them. The X-Men are surprised, so they proceed to run away. Gambit blows a hole in the wall, and he and Jean find that all the soldiers outside are sleeping. Onslaught appears to Jean, takes credit for knocking out the soldiers, and tells her that it was a gift.

Finally, Archangel and Psylocke wake up to find a Juggernaut-shaped shadow looming over them.

How It Was: After filling in for Andy Kubert two months previous, Pascual Ferry takes a shot filling in on Uncanny and does a pretty awesome job. While not a whole lot happens this issue, he manages to make Gambit and Jean’s escape look more frantic and action-packed than it actually is; he also sets a great mood with the shadowing in the Cyclops/Kelly sequences, definitely capturing the conspiracy mystery vibe. It’s too bad that there’s never any real payoff from this setup; it seems like Kelly is afraid Operation Zero Tolerance is going to kill him, but later it’s made clear that OZT doesn’t care about him at all, even releasing him after capturing Cyclops.

Really, this issue is setting up the main threat for after the Onslaught crossover, and frankly it’s a nice change of pace to see the X-Office planning these things so far in advance. While Bastion’s presentation only exists to regurgitate plot points from past X-Men issues so they’ll be fresh on people’s minds, the fact that he identifies Gambit and Jean, along with his appearance, adds some mystique to him. The fact that the head of this anti-mutant program is being run by an obvious non-human is very intriguing indeed. Jean and Gambit’s escape also makes for a brief, but well-executed action set piece.

The Archangel/Psylocke thread is a misfire. While it’s nice to check in on them after their injuries, all they do is recap what’s happened to them thus far and pass out. Psylocke is sensing psionic screams because of her exposure to the Crimson Dawn? What does that even mean? And it is very unclear whether Archangel passes out from the pain or crashes into the ground. Either way, neither character comes out of this looking particularly good. In fact, the falling unconscious serves no purpose except to create some anti-climactic tension, since they pick up right where they left off after they wake up. It’s a cheap plot device to postpone the scene for the cliffhanger, and it doesn’t work at all.

There are some nice, but insignificant moments in the Blackbird. It’s becoming clear at this point that the Dark Beast plot has some holes in it; namely, that he’s somehow hiding on a team with three of the world’s most powerful telepaths on it. And while this gets explained by Onslaught later, it still doesn’t answer why the Dark Beast thought this was a good plan in the first place, ignorant of Onslaught as he was. He really had no plan for this? And why is he still on the team after already being captured by Sinister once? Also, it’s about this point that the X-writers start to abandon subtlety as far as the hints that Xavier is Onslaught are concerned. The mystery doesn’t work at all because we’re only presented with one potential suspect who keeps acting more and more disturbed.

This issue crosses over with X-Force #55 for no particular reason; it’s a weak attempt to boost readership of the other X-books. Later we’ll see that many X-titles started having events happen in the completely wrong titles, but more on that later. While the Archangel/Psylocke sequences are panel padding nonsense, the introduction of Bastion goes off really well and succeeds in creating some intrigue in the events to follow Onslaught. Sure, the “hints” at Onslaught’s motivations never make sense in the long run, but as I said before, the focus is mostly on Zero Tolerance for next year.

B+